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March 2005

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Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Psalms 81: 1 - 16

1 Sing for joy to God our strength; Shout joyfully to the God of Jacob. 2 Raise a song, strike the timbrel, The sweet sounding lyre with the harp. 3 Blow the trumpet at the new moon, At the full moon, on our feast day. 4 For it is a statute for Israel, An ordinance of the God of Jacob. 5 He established it for a testimony in Joseph When he went throughout the land of Egypt. I heard a language that I did not know: 6 "I relieved his shoulder of the burden, His hands were freed from the basket. 7 "You called in trouble and I rescued you; I answered you in the hiding place of thunder; I proved you at the waters of Meribah. Selah.

8 "Hear, O My people, and I will admonish you; O Israel, if you would listen to Me! 9 "Let there be no strange god among you; Nor shall you worship any foreign god. 10 "I, the LORD, am your God, Who brought you up from the land of Egypt; Open your mouth wide and I will fill it. 11 "But My people did not listen to My voice, And Israel did not obey Me. 12 "So I gave them over to the stubbornness of their heart, To walk in their own devices. 13 "Oh that My people would listen to Me, That Israel would walk in My ways! 14 "I would quickly subdue their enemies And turn My hand against their adversaries. 15 "Those who hate the LORD would pretend obedience to Him, And their time {of punishment} would be forever. 16 "But I would feed you with the finest of the wheat, And with honey from the rock I would satisfy you."

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Tuesday, March 29, 2005

how do I love thee (my church) .... Let me count the ways......
╖ itТs brand new (launched Nov 7, 2004) and God is very present and a part of every step
╖The pastor has a heart for every member of the congregation and prays for us all daily by name
╖The worship is awesome, eclectic, and powerful
╖ It's the first place that DH and I have found where we both are growing and being fed (since our church we went to in HS)
╖ I have friends my own age and people who are challenging me in my faith
╖Eric and I are both playing on the worship team
╖There were 15 visitors on Easter!!!!!
╖More and more people are getting involved and wanting to do stuff
╖We had 10 or so people go through the membership class (DH and I included)
╖6 of us (DH and I included) were baptized on Palm Sunday
╖I'll be attending a women's bible study starting this Sunday and I'm so excited for this; I've never been at a church with a women's study that I've been able to attend

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Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Eric's check ride with the FAA has been scheduled for next Wednesday. Prayers for good weather, time to practice between now and then, and working planes would be greatly appreciated.

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Monday, March 21, 2005

Many of you know that today Eric and I were baptized. You also know that this was a decision that was not easy for me to make. And it wasn't until yesterday that I think I felt fully at peace with my decision.

I really didn't expect much out of it today. Baptism was practically ignored in my upbringing, and when it was discussed in my other circles, it wasn't that big of a deal, except that it was obeying one of God's commands. I wasn't making a big deal of it today. I didn't tell many people. I invited some of my co-workers, not expecting anyone to come (and no one did). But as far as people at church knowing, I didn't really tell anyone. Some people knew because they saw us in the baptism 'class.' A couple other people heard through the grapevine. But I didn't share it. Probably because it was a really hard thing for me to decide to do, and I didn't want to draw attention to myself.

The more people who found out the more I had to explain why I'd never been baptized before. It was hard to explain, although the words are getting easier and easier to find.

Since our church meets physically in a community center, we had to 'borrow' the baptismal of our mother church this afternoon. That was rather fitting and really nice, since it was the first church Eric and I attended as a married couple.

The celebration/ceremony/whathaveyou started at 1. A couple people had a lot of family come watch. Eric and I had no one except the congregation who showed up to watch in general.

We started with singing. I don't know why, but I just started crying. I couldn't sing. I didn't even like the songs we were singing, but I couldn't stop crying. I think it was Satan attacking me and trying to make me chicken out. I don't believe that baptism can spiritually change a person (which is one reason I had such a hard time with my decision to be baptized), but I guess Satan was really present. He just didn't want me to do this. He kept telling me that I was ignoring everything I was taught growing up. And that I will be dishonoring my entire family (who I've asked, and they don't care).

And then I stopped crying. Just as quick as I started.

There were 6 of us. I was the last to give my testimony. Eric and I really have similar testimonies, which is strange since I was raised in a Christian home and he wasn't ... but it was our relationship with each other that really strengthened us in the Lord. And our testimonies are quite funny, I guess, since we both had the entire congregation laughing for a good part of them.

When the actual act of being baptized came, I was getting nervous again. But I knew with Eric by my side, and Jesus watching, I was doing the right thing. We were last to go. Because this was something we wanted to do together, and so much of our history is shared, we were 'dunked' at the same time. That was the best part ... having my husband next to me in the tank.

I didn't feel anything special when I came up, as I suspected. I donТt' feel any different now. But I do feel confident that I did the right thing and I have obeyed my Lord's command to be baptized in water.

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Friday, March 18, 2005

Eric passed his stage check!!!!!

Now, when the weather clears up, he'll take his FAA check ride!

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Thursday, March 17, 2005

I have a headache. It won't go away. Had it when I woke up this morning. I've taken Claritin thinking it was sinus, ibuprofen, and Tylenol. I want to go home and sleep. Maybe that's what my headache is from, not enough sleep. Sigh

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Monday, March 14, 2005

I'm now thankful for God's layer of peace over me. I'm scared, but overall I'm at peace with my upcoming medical test.

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Today I'm thankful for the knowledge that when today is over, the day is over. And I can leave work and not think about it until tomorrow at 8 am.

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Thursday, March 10, 2005

I've always had a hard time reading. I don't think I read that slowly, nor do I have a problem with comprehension, but my retention leaves something to be desired. And that's because my mind wanders like crazy when I read. If I'm reading with a goal in mind, like to answer questions, or to look for a specific something, or to do my math/science homework, I can retain just find. My mind doesn't wander too much. But if I'm just reading, anything --- novel, newspaper, magazine, bible, etc ----- my mind is just moving a mile a minute. I can't focus on what I'm reading.

When I was in HS biology we did presentations on various biological diseases/disorders. One student did ADD. He passed out a list of classic ADD symptoms and said doctors look for you to have something like 75% of the symptoms and if you do you most likely have ADD. I read through the list of symptoms (and signs and family history) and I had every single one of them. I don't know if I really "believe in" ADD, so I'm not sure if that's my problem exactly, but I do know I have a reading retention problem due to a wandering mind.

When I was in college and being discipled, I was talking with my mentor about my daily devotions and why I have a hard time doing them. I mentioned that I have a hard time focusing on what I read, and also when I pray. She gave me some advice and read to me something written by somebody about focusing and keeping the mind from wandering. Ironically, I couldn't keep focused on what she was saying and I have no clue what that advice was.

So yesterday I was sharing my reading frustrations with some people here on the forum and got some advice to try while reading my bible. She suggested that I take some basic questions (about 5 or 6 of them) and look for answers in my reading. I tried that this morning. It was amazing. It was a short chapter so it was easy to try. As I was reading I felt like I was reading with a purpose and was able to look for answers to the questions and even did get answers. I underlined and marked the appropriate verses in my bible, then answered the questions in my journal. Amazing. Now, and hour and a half later, I actually remember what I read and marked and took away from my reading.

PRAISE GOD!!!

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Wednesday, March 9, 2005

I'm thankful for the full night's sleep I seemed to have gotten last night.

And I'm thankful that Eric is not only gracious in his failing his stage check, but agrees with his failing and will use this to improve his weaknesses before his FAA check ride.

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Tuesday, March 8, 2005

I'm thankful today for the fun I had this weekend with my friend Angela.

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Friday, March 4, 2005

Today I am very grateful for my phone call with my sister yesterday. We talked for about 30 minutes about my fears and concerns with my upcoming doc appt. And we talked about life in general. It was wonderful to talk with someone about this. Don't get me wrong, my mom and husband are great for this sort of thing, but I think my sister "gets it" more than me

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Thursday, March 3, 2005

Friends:
Today's theme is friends.

I have a few. Most don't live near me.

Sarah is my best friend from middle school. She was my maid of honor. We don't chat much anymore, but we are still friends. My heart still aches for her when I hear of her pain. My heart laughs when I hear of her joys. Her sister is like my sister. Her family is like my family. We do e-mail on occasion and IM every now and then, but busy schedules keep us from talking frequently.

Angela is my friend who got me through college. She challenged me and encouraged me. She kept me accountable and prayed for and with me. She loved me and supported me. She made me laugh and made me cry. There were times I wanted her to just leave me alone, and times I never wanted to leave her side. We also don't chat as much as we would like, but when we do it's like we never stopped. She's coming to visit me this weekend. I'm so excited, but sad that she's only here for a weekend.

Shawnta is my coworker. She's not Christian, but she is a pastor's kid. She is a lot of fun to talk with at work. I've hung out with her some outside of work. She's one of about 3 people at work I actually talk with about non-work related things.

Gail is another co-worker who I have non-work related conversations with. She's my mother's age, so it's like having my mom here to talk with, but she's also very much my friend. She's very supportive and loving. And she's Jewish. I don't know if she practices, but she does observe the holidays. She's a great source of empathy and sympathy if I need it.

Josh is my only Christian co-worker (in my department). He's also a PK. And he's a former marine. It's wonderful to work with another political conservative. He has 2 children, late elementary aged I think. He's a great source of spiritual encouragement during the day. I hope I am to him as well.

Allie is one of my friends from church. She and her husband are about 24 weeks pregnant with their first child. They've been married 5 years. Like myself, Allie is very hungry for women fellowship and bible study. Non-social prayer time, mostly I think.

Andrew is our pastor. He's in his early 30s; not even 10 years older than myself. It's a little weird for me to have a pastor so young, in my generation, his children young enough to be my children. But he's an awesome man of God and I love listening to his sermons and his daily life. He's a man of prayer. At our last church meeting, he went through his prayer notebook and shared with us all the people he prays for daily. How awesome to know that our pastor not only knows the entire congregation by name (it's small, so it's still easy), but he knows our concerns and life issues and prays for us daily. And he looks like Moses in "Prince of Egypt."

Nichole is my one friend I made while going to grad school. She's also Christian. She just had her first baby about 6 months ago. We don't talk much, but she was, I think, the one thing that helped me get through my first year in California. She was the only person I really knew at school and so she was the only person I could study with and talk with. She really helped me learn my way around school.

My mom. She's ... my mom. She's a source of encouragement, prayer, love, hope, joy, laughter, pain, and of course all my physical problems I inherited from her. She's honest and true with us. She wants us to share with her everything we do. She's nonjudgmental, but tells us like it is (or like she sees it). She wants us to be honest and true with her. Even if she doesn't approve, she wants to be a part. And if I ever need her, I can holler and she'll give me a kiss.

My sister Roberta. She's my sister. My only sister. The only one who knows me when I was growing up. She knows the real me better than anyone; and I think that's because the real ME and the real HER are a lot more alike than either of us want to admit. She's been married just 2 months less than me. She and her husband moved to NY about 8 months ago. She is experiencing similar things to me. New job, new marriage, BIIIIIG city, friends far away, family far away, loving husband, new life.

Brandy is from CW. I've never met her in real life. But we're the same age (I honestly don't remember who's older), similar life statuses, similar experiences, both have family in CO. She's a huge source of love and prayer for me this last year.

Catherine, also from CW, has been like my little sister. We met for the first time IRL in August. We met in Sacramento. We've seen each other one other time since then, at an Avalon concert. She's very special to me and I can't imagine my life, CW or otherwise, without her.

Kathy has been like an online mom to me. But also a very good friend. A source of prayer and encouragement. A source of laughter and joy. A true friend.

And all you other CWers are very special to me. All a source of prayer. I know if I ask for prayer that I'll get it. If I need some help procrastinating, I know I'll find it here. If I want a good ol' time to fill an unplanned evening, I know I can find it here.

The key words in all this have been prayer, encouragement and love. We don't need to agree with each other all the time. We don't need to have a lot in common. We don't need to even live in the same state. But commitment to prayer, encouragement, and love.

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Tuesday, March 1, 2005

Today I'm thankful that I don't have to work tomorrow. Although I'm not looking forward to what I get to do tomorrow, I don't have to be at work!

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